Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Take this and eat it

Preparing to receive communion is like preparing to lift off the ground and fly around, unaided. I can think about it, ask for forgiveness, try to get in the right frame of mind and soul beforehand, but no matter what I think, what I say, even what I believe at that moment, nothing properly prepares me for the those few minutes when he dwells within me. How can it be that God, master of all existence, creator of the stars, the mountains and my senses, the savior of my soul, enters into me with such peace, as if nothing happened at all? I wonder how it is that we don’t explode, right then and there, because God, GOD! has just entered a lowly human body. God enters his own creation, and we just return to our pew and try to understand what has really just happened. God, the perfect and all-knowing, just gave himself to me, so that I may live.

I think there are more than just one miracle at every Mass. First of all, God lets a human sinful man call on him to make himself fully present to us. The priest acts as Christ! Only Jesus himself would allow this, for on the surface it seems blasphemous. Next, we are to eat him! Just the idea of consuming him isn’t a miracle, but that fact we survive it is. And above everything else, how it is, that people can do this, and may not believe, may not be in the right state (as far as mortal sins are concerned), and still walk away unharmed physically (their soul is another question)? I absolutely love going to communion, but it is terrifying.

Another thing that always happens to me is, sitting there just before we get up to get in line, I think, “maybe he isn’t there”. It’s always a slight, passing thought. The devil, perhaps, lurking around. But then I go and say “AMEN!” and right then, I know I was wrong. Right after communion is when I feel at complete peace, full and have not a need in the world. The Eucharist has been my comfort so many times, and I may write about my history with it. But Jesus is there, and somehow enters my sad self and brings no harm, but instead everything I’ve ever needed.

Pray for all the priests that bring Jesus to our dying souls!

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