Saturday, June 19, 2010

Year in review (roommate edition) and a peep ahead

My conclusion for the year: The people I think I know well, I really only barely know. Living with someone is a growing experience. Not just in the surface, “I will learn more” and share a lot of experiences with a person, but that I will realize things about a person I never saw before, or would never expect. It’s both good and bad.

This past year has been my first true roommate situation, in that I’ve lived here (and not simply slept here) and that we have all grown together (and not simply avoided each other). Yes, I’ve learned a lot about them, but even more about myself. I now dare call myself an introvert, and I’ve recently come to the conclusion that all three of my roommates are extroverts. Although I try to avoid the trite classification of people, I think this particular distinction has also led me to learn some things about myself.

For instance, I don’t communicate with many people on a day to day basis. I see my friends, and particularly, my roommates, always texting someone, receiving calls, making calls, meeting up with tons of people, and comparatively I hardly do any of that. This, at first, bothered me. But on the days I do text many people, or have to make a lot of calls, I’m relieved when I’m done with it. It seems to be a case of seeing others happy and trying to mimic the outside doings. But really this won’t contribute much to my own happiness because that is not how I respond to those things.

Also, my roommates are one thousand times better than me at always having something to discuss. They are much more interested in fashion, and how people interact with other people than myself, and thus always have something to say. Again, realizing this has helped me not get overwhelmed when I seem to be lacking.

I’ve grown to like myself a whole lot more. I have seen how others process information, communicate to others, and make decisions, and I’ve been able to analyze how I do these things too. It’s made me more confident in my decisions and get a good understanding of why I think and do certain things. And these “whys” aren’t necessarily needed for me to explain to others. I’d actually rather have them for myself so that I can retain peace in my heart.

Although this year I’ve gotten very close with all of them, I have had to struggle for my place here and for them to understand me. If you get me going, I will talk on and on about things. I like to think about things from different angles, test ideas, play around with solutions. None of my roommates are very good to do this with. I think it is because I seem to contradict myself. This sort of discussion also requires a lot of time and participation. Normally, someone breaks in and explains something to me (that I understand already), offers a solution (which isn’t really what I was after), or completely misses what I’m talking about at all. It can be frustrating. Even with these few differences in personality (and maybe because of them), I couldn’t have dreamed of better roommates. I have had a great year with them and will miss living with them.

I also miss blogging. It provides a place where I can be confused, and no one will offer suggestions or comments until I’ve got it all out. I’ve seen, especially this year, that the world is moving much too quickly for the heart’s needs to be met. My heart needs quiet, simple things, a listening ear (be that God’s or a friend’s), adventure, and a whole lot more time than I will probably ever get.

I hope in the next year, I can use this blog to focus on these things. Traveling has always provided a quick way to get all of them, and I have some great trips planned. In August, I’ll be going to Maine with my mom. We’ve never been before, and look forward to exploring Acadia National Park and the Catholic history there. She has also booked a hotel in Mexico for December! We will be staying in Merida and seeing Mayan ruins! Not much else has been planned yet for the trips, but I can’t wait!

1 comment:

  1. Ruth, I believe God has given you a great honor in that trait us moderns label introversion. I believe He delights in you as His precious daughter. You probably teach your roommates so many things by being different from them.

    I also miss you blogging, and I know others do too! It's nice to read your writing again!